I have always had a thing for watches. Ever since young I loved collecting watches. From fancy pink to matte black, I had all the colours. It was like a trend years ago when you wear colourful watches matching your outfits. You are considered to be the cool kid when you own many watches. As I grow up, i realised that colourful watches aren't as cool as I thought it was and nothing is better than sticking with one watch which can be used for a long time.
When I was 18, I bought my very first expensive watch. Black and shiny. The moment I saw it, I knew that it is the one! It was love at first sight I would say. It was so beautiful and I couldnt take my eyes off. Ever since I bought the watch, I stayed loyal to it. No affairs with any other watches. I stopped looking at any other watch as my whole love was already given to the black shiny watch that I own right now. At least, I was loyal enough to the watch than I was in any relationships.
The watch and I had a good relationship. For 5 years, we were madly in love. Yeah, sometimes, it would give up on me by 'dying'. I had to re-fix my relationship by giving it a new 'life' (battery). But, things never changed.
One day, I cheated on my watch. I bought a new watch. I had no idea why did I buy a new watch when my black shiny was still in a good condition. I didnt even think twice before I cheat. I was having a good time with my new red watch and have totally forgotten about my black shiny watch. And one night, i had a dream. A dream that i should have taken serious. I dreamt like black shiny has died exactly at 12:34.
I am a person who believes in the power of the universe. In a day, I will at least see the time 12:34 for once. Either in the morning or at midnight, I'll definitely see the time at least once a day, no matter how busy am I. So, I did not take the dream I had about balck and shiny as a serious one.
Days passed. I missed my black and shiny. So i looked for it and found it somewhere in my bagpack. I took the watch out exactly at 12:34. I remember the time because i accidentally looked at my clock on my laptop's desktop while looking for my black and shiny. And i looked at my black and shiny, it was showing 12:34 as well. I laughed at myself how silly I can be thinking that there is a hidden message by universe to me and continued to do whatever work I was doing before I started looking for black and shiny.
Hours passed. I was in the middle of doing something and had a glance on my black and shiny. And my heart stopped for a moment. Black and shiny had stopped working exactly at 12:34 on the 19th of March, which was the day after I had my dream about the watch. I.....
.... To be continued....
Disclaimer : I am not a professional nor someone who has an in-depth knowledge of psychological issues. I just wanted to keep a journal of what I am currently experiencing for my own self, as well to help to those experience the same issue. This is also not an act of seeking sympathy or attention from anyone. Merely writing it for myself and for those who are experiencing anxiety like myself too. It was December, in 2017. The usual yearly vacation with my family season, where on the particular year we decided to go to the Pangkor Island. It was all fun, till I was swept off by the waves into the middle of the sea and my brothers were trying to save me from drowning in the sea. My eldest brother was holding onto my hands, and something told me to let go off it as I will not survive it. And I decided to let go off the hand. I heard my brothers screaming asking me to reach for their hands. But I felt calm as I drifted off from everything and everyone. I knew I was already d...
Comments
Post a Comment